GET OVER IT
Our society is not equipped to see the griever upset for very long and has a misperception that being stoic and strong is the answer instead of crying and mourning. On the contrary, grief is a process, a journey that recognizes no timetable or finish line. Grief is necessary that transforms itself and fluctuates over time.
FORGET THEIR LOVED ONE
It is very unhealthy and nearly impossible for a griever to forget their loved one. They cannot pretend as if their loved one never existed. Most grievers think of their loved one on a daily basis no matter how long ago they passed on.
It is impossible for a griever to move on as if nothing ever happened when the very foundation in which their life was built on has been shattered. Their life is shattered and forever changed.
GET BACK TO THEIR OLD SELF
A griever is forever changed after a major loss. They are no longer the same person. They are thrust into a new normal that takes time to discover and handle.
COMPLETELY STOP HURTING
As much as griever’s want the pain to stop and as much as the people in their lives want to see the griever not hurting anymore, grief bursts will continue to erupt (some at the most inconvenient times). As life continues, so do the family get-togethers, holidays, and anniversaries. These life events can be the catalyst of a grief burst just as much as a rainy day.
INTEGRATE LIFE, LOSS AND LOVE
A griever does not get over it, they learn to live with it. A griever can learn how to embrace, engage and connect as they integrate the loss of their loved one into a new life.
A griever can move forward with this integration. They can have a willingness to live and grow and be emotionally intelligent.
REMEMBER AND HONOR
A griever can integrate their loved one’s memory into their future by honoring their loved one in many ways; journaling and letter writing to their loved one – collecting photographs and making scrapbooks or collages – sharing and reminiscing stories and memories with others – using their loved one’s name in conversations.
EMBRACE A NEW SELF
Grievers can learn to understand that part of them has died and they been forever changed as well as learn that there is a new self ready to emerge. This is a great opportunity for growth and healthy choices.
CHANNEL THEIR PAIN INTO NEW ENERGY
Grievers can pour their pain into new missions, passions, calling, and purpose. They are equipped with to reach out with compassion and empathy.